Is there really such thing as the "average" woman? These days it seems like she's the only woman who can go without criticism. So why, as women, are we allowing others to condemn us with just one “correct” body type?
This argument has been going on for years, even decades! But the more progressive we think we are becoming, the more it seems we are at a stand still. Who knows if we humans will ever come to an agreement on this subject. In a perfect world, there would be no “perfect” size, just an acceptance that everyone is an individual and therefore no one should look the same. Yet, we live in this negative, narcissistic world which chastises women who are too thin, too fat, too tall, or too anything! You have to be “average” to escape the sharp words and even then, you can hear the reproach.
So why are we [women] tearing each other down rather than building each other up? The answer is because we are human. The cause is much deeper than the words that slide off our tongue. Part of the cause is psychological. We choose to take part in social exclusion. We take our own faults and project them onto others. These practices allow us to feel better about the things we may deem unflattering about ourselves. Physical appearance is the first thing we notice about anyone because our eyes work faster than our mouths.
An outfit, a crazy hairstyle, or an undesired body type can all be topics of ridicule for women. The victims of this foul play are usually strangers to those making the comments. So why is it that we feel we can assume so much about someone we know so little? If we don't know someone, we don't know their story, their thoughts, their hidden disorders, their complicated lifestyles. Many of these are explanations [ones which we'll never hear or they'll never tell] for why women are shaped differently.
This argument has been going on for years, even decades! But the more progressive we think we are becoming, the more it seems we are at a stand still. Who knows if we humans will ever come to an agreement on this subject. In a perfect world, there would be no “perfect” size, just an acceptance that everyone is an individual and therefore no one should look the same. Yet, we live in this negative, narcissistic world which chastises women who are too thin, too fat, too tall, or too anything! You have to be “average” to escape the sharp words and even then, you can hear the reproach.
So why are we [women] tearing each other down rather than building each other up? The answer is because we are human. The cause is much deeper than the words that slide off our tongue. Part of the cause is psychological. We choose to take part in social exclusion. We take our own faults and project them onto others. These practices allow us to feel better about the things we may deem unflattering about ourselves. Physical appearance is the first thing we notice about anyone because our eyes work faster than our mouths.
An outfit, a crazy hairstyle, or an undesired body type can all be topics of ridicule for women. The victims of this foul play are usually strangers to those making the comments. So why is it that we feel we can assume so much about someone we know so little? If we don't know someone, we don't know their story, their thoughts, their hidden disorders, their complicated lifestyles. Many of these are explanations [ones which we'll never hear or they'll never tell] for why women are shaped differently.
Anyone, of any size, can have a weight issue. Skinny or fat, we all face criticisms. There is no stone left unturned in this category. As women, we literally feel the “weight” of the world on our shoulders as we struggle with body image. That weight can cause us to break and when we break, trouble finds us. Women become anorexic, bulimic, or resort to binge eating. Problem is, the pressure that broke us first, becomes the constant push that leads to a downward spiral. Luckily, some women are able to receive help and treatment but there are others who don’t find the help they need and then find themselves at rock bottom. The point is, we don’t always know someone’s circumstances or the battles they fight every single day.
My Story
Personally, I enjoy working out! But I also love to eat anything from ribs, pasta, pizza, burgers, not to mention my overwhelming sweet tooth! My active lifestyle and my love for food keep me balanced, yet at this challenging age [25], I’d still love to see a change in my body. Every woman has her own idea of what her body should look like or what she would like it to look like. We exercise, go on crazy diets, and constantly stare at the scale just to reach this “goal” we have set for our bodies.
I’m quite a slim girl so I’ve never really had to watch what I eat. However, as I get older, my metabolism is slowing down and no matter how often I find myself at the gym, I just can’t seem to get in that “fit” shape that I see for myself. So it really irks me to hear “you need a sandwich” or “go eat a cheeseburger,” when my goal is to avoid those things in order to get a body in which I’m comfortable.
I’m quite a slim girl so I’ve never really had to watch what I eat. However, as I get older, my metabolism is slowing down and no matter how often I find myself at the gym, I just can’t seem to get in that “fit” shape that I see for myself. So it really irks me to hear “you need a sandwich” or “go eat a cheeseburger,” when my goal is to avoid those things in order to get a body in which I’m comfortable.
In high school, these type of remarks were at an all-time high. I’ve always been the tall, skinny, gangly girl in school. You know, the one with arms so long she can reach the highest shelf? The one who takes one step for every 3 steps you take? The one with a small chest? Yep, that was me. It didn’t help much that I was highly involved in sports and activities which allowed me to eat loads of food and keep my tiny waist. The words that people said about my weight or my height never really seemed to affect me. |
However, I got tired of constantly defending myself and my eating habits. Why is it that I was getting picked on for something that I couldn’t do anything to change? Why is it not okay to be slim and slender? Even now I have a hard time wrapping my brain around why women, or human beings in general, feel the need criticize each other based on shape or size! If you're healthy, you should be happy and realize that perhaps others are as well.
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